Once i asked my bestfriend when he married his girl after dating her for two weeks,"Bro, you married her after just 2weeks of dating? Why did you do that? That is crazy, man."
And he answered,"No, it is not crazy when you already know what you want and what is it you are looking for. So when you have found that person you immediately know you have found the one."
That got me thinking for a long time. I think hard of what i want and what i am looking for in my life partner, and i have found the answer.
I want a guy that shares my passion in arts and music. I want a guy that makes great artworks and makes arts as his job. The talent in a guy is his inner beauty.
To me money is not very important. As long he is responsible, can feed me and put roof on top of my head is enough for me. Since i am a woman with petite body and limited energy i know my limits. I cannot work and take care of family both equally well at the same time. I prefer family than work. So he must be man enough to provide for the family.
I realized something very important when my mom passed away. She worked very hard daily day and night when she was alive. But when i looked at her laying there in the coffin with all her expensive bags and clothings beside her, i realized she brought nothing with her on her death. All those expensive things were just to be burned with her. She could not wear them or took them with her. She brought nothing, just like when she was born with nothing.
So this made me realize money is not that important. When you are dead, what is left of you is just the memories, none of your things really mattered to those people who loved you. Only relationships and memories of you that lasts forever in the hearts.
Because of this i also realized spending time with the people you love and care about is more important than wasting time fighting and arguing. Fights and arguments are small insignificant futile things in a mature relationship. I don't get angry more than 24hours in most cases because those are what i think about in life. I deeply hope to find a guy with this same level of maturity and forgiveness.
I am born to be mischievous and curious girl. Patience, is number one quality i want from a guy beside loyalty.
I expect loyalty because i give my utmost loyalty in return. I am a very loyal person to my man. I take this very seriously. Not just as 'what is to be expected when you are in a relationship' but because it is my 'life principle' and it is 'sewed to my bones.'
Honesty. Honestly, i can take almost anything, i am quite tough. Just be honest, and we can handle it together. I will support you as your pillar. Don't play the hero because we are only human. This is what i think.
Funny. I like to joke. This is one of the most important quality i want from a man. If he is always serious i will die on first date.
Lead but not dictator and i will follow. I am frustrated and confused if the man lets me do whatever i want even when it is bad. As bad as wanting to jump off the roof to the pool bad.
Respect my privacy and freedom. As i respect his freedom to hangout with his friends and how he spend his time.
Physically i like tall man, at least 172cm never less than that. Any shorter and its not attractive :D
Amazing laughs. Come on, i like to joke. Of course he must have amazing laughs. Because he might laugh all the time.
Broad shoulders, so i can borrow to sleep and carry my electric guitar. :D
Not fat but not thin. I don't like too much muscles, not attractive at all.
Nice voice is good, so i can listen to him all day long. Doesn't matter what he says.
Live in the present, think for the future.
I never care of what was done in the past, because the past is the past. People make mistake but we learn and we move on. I don't care about his past and i don't like to mention the past. If he still brings up a mistake i did last year, i will run away and never look back. It is just too scary, this kind of guy is full of bitterness and absolutely not for me. I hate negativity.
I prefer guys who keep quiet when angry but talks after has cooled down than saying things that hurts and apologized after. Because sometimes i am overflowed with emotions when angry and will say stupid things. No need two of us.
Trust. I like to be trusted. Because i am very loyal, there is no need for doubts or jealousy. As i trust him too. Being distrustful and jealous to me is the most stupid thing a man i love can do. It just shows how much he knows me. Which is very little or none at all.
I like guys who keeps his words and not bullshits all the time. To me guys who keep his words are manly and to be respected.
Last of all, is respect. He must earn my respect naturally not forcefully. I need this badly. I must respect my man or all hell breaks loose. If i don't respect him, it is difficult for me to do anything else like to make him happy and content. Cook for him, support him, follow his lead, etc. Because i simply don't follow anyone who i think is below me not above me. It is simple hierarchy system.
To gain respect first he must prove that he is a man. Does not have to be hard and like a tyrant. I like gentle man. But not gay of course. The rest must come naturally. His actions and how he live his life is usually proof enough for me. This cannot be explained by words as it is something gained not said.